where I've been

This is unreal. Malcolm does not sit down. Unless he is sitting down to:

a. eat

b. bang his sippy cup on the tile until the stopper dislodges and he drips so much milk on the floor that it creates a puddle the width of the hallway so that when he stands up and tries to walk away, he slips and falls, bangs his head on the tile, and cries as if he hasn't already hit his head on something 15 other times this morning. All this happened in less than a minute.

I don't know how much more of this I can take. The other day, a few of my friends were over, and we are in the living room. Brooke walks by the kitchen and gasps in that way a person gasps when someone is severely hurt. Angie and I run in there, and Malcolm had gotten the scoop out of the cat food bag, filled it, and sprinkled and even layer of cat food all over the kitchen floor. I was unimpressed. He usually dumps the whole bag.

He also does/ tries to do all of the following things AT LEAST once a day: eat the cat food, eat the legos, eat the paints, eat acorns, climb the dresser, climb the rock wall on the swingset, climb on top of the kitchen table, climb on top of the kitchen counter, remove things from the kitchen counter (knives, apples, jars of peanut butter), put something in the toilet, put something in the fridge, take things out of the fridge, take things out of the pantry, empty any and all kitchen cabinets, take out every toy he owns and throw it around his bedroom, throw a ball and almost hit something/ someone, throw whatever is in his hands when he sees something more enticing, throw a leapster on the floor, throw a sippy cup at the wall, bang his sippy cup on the table, bang his cup on the sliding glass door, bang his cup on his sister's head, fall and hit his head (an average of 3.5 times a day. I guess when you have a head that takes up such a large percentage of your body's surface area, odds are that is what is going to get hit), trip and land on his butt, trip and throw something, sprawl out on the floor for a temper tantrum, somehow secure a writing utensil and draw on a surface that is not supposed to be drawn on.

All that before naptime. I wish I could say I was exaggerating.

So, now you know why I haven't been blogging much. 

Who, me?