sometimes there's only one word you want to say

Today started out great.  I went to the gym, had a great work out, took a shower, all going as normal for a Tuesday.  I had to go get my step-mom a birthday gift, so I went to Ross for a houseware item, 2 kids in tow.  I had planned to be quick, and they handled it all fairly well.  Malcolm only screamed part of the time, but I wasn't there very long. I go to check out, and my card is declined.  Try again.  I know there's money in there.  Declined.  I call, check the balance, plenty of money.  Go back, try again.  Declined.  I figure Ross is being weird, and the vase was kinda tacky anyway, so I leave and go (by go I mean drag two whiny kids through the rain as an errand that was supposed to take 10 minutes turns into a morning long event) to Pier One which is a few stores down.  There, I find a much classier vase (of course).  I pick it up, decide I like it, place it on a table so I can hoist up Malcolm, who I am holding on my hip against his will (have you ever tried to hold a 32 lb. toddler on your hip against his will?).  He is flailing his arm in an attempt to hit something and work out his frustration.  His target?  The classy vase. He makes contact.  Angels from Heaven descend to balance and guide the vase into my hand at the last possible second, when I thought all was lost.  Whew.  It is their only one.  I decide to look no further, march the vase up to the register, plop it down, and wrestle Malcolm some more.  (Why oh why did I not grab the stroller from the trunk?  Who cares that it was pouring down rain...)  The lovely man behind the counter helps me get my card out of my wallet, runs it through the register and... declined.  I ask him to hold the vase for me, go get a cart to put the beast in, and call the bank.  Apparently, they sent us new cards in MARCH that we never activated.  Only the Good Lord knows where those cards are now.  Somewhere in the abyss that is my desk.  The bank lady is able to reactivate my card so I can at least buy the vase and accomplish SOMETHING today.  I go back in and get in line.  While in line with one screaming toddler and one whiny four year old, I get butted (butt? what's the proper tense here?) by a woman who was Hell bent on paying for her faux eucalyptus and reeds before I did.  When it is finally my turn, Malcolm is going full blast, Ceci is asking 100 questions, and I am ready to chew my arm off.  I pay and split.  It is still raining as I load the kids into the car.  I am wet.  My phone is ringing.  I ignore it.  I get my purse and the bag, and I break the vase as I am putting it in the car.